Chew on this..

Don’t be fooled by me
Author - Unknown

Don’t be fooled by me, don’t be fooled by the face I wear
For I wear a thousand masks, masks that I’m afraid to take off, and none of them are me.
Pretending is an art that is second nature to me,
But don’t be fooled, for God’s sake, don’t be fooled.
I give the impression that I’m secure within as well as without,
That confidence is my name and coolness my game;
But don’t believe me, please, don’t believe me.
My surface may seem smooth, but my surface is my mask.
Beneath dwells the realms of confusion, of fear and aloneness.
But I hide this. I don’t want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weakness and fear being exposed.
That is why I frantically create a mask to hide behind,
To shield from the glance that knows.
But such a glance is precisely my salvation, my only salvation and I know it
That is, if followed by acceptance,
Followed by love,
It’s the only thing that will assure me of what I can’t assure myself,
That I am worth something.
But I don’t tell you this. I don’t dare. I’m afraid to.
I’m afraid your glance will be followed by non-acceptance,
I’m afraid you’ll think less of me, that you’ll laugh at me, and your laugh could kill me.
I’m afraid that deep-down I’m nothing, I’m no good
And you will see this and reject me.
So I play my game, my desperate game,
With a façade of assurance outside and trembling child inside,
And so begins the parade of masks, and my life becomes a front.

I idly chatter to you in the suave tones of surface talk,
I tell you everything that is really nothing,
And nothing of what’s everything, of what’s crying within me.
So when I’m going through my routine, do not be fooled by what I’m saying,
What I’d like to be able to say, what for survival, I need to say but what I can’t say.

I dislike hiding, honestly, I dislike hiding.
I dislike the superficial game I’m playing, the phony game,
I’d really like to be spontaneous, and genuine and me,
But you’ve got to help me, you’ve got to hold out your hand,
Even when that’s the last thing I seem to want.
Only you can wipe away from my eyes the blank stares of breathing death,
Only you can make me alive.
Each time you are kind and gentle and encouraging,
Each time you understand because you really care,
My heart begins to grow wings, very small wings, very feeble wings but wings,
With your sensitivity and sympathy and your power of understanding,
You can breathe new life into me, I want you to know that.

I want you to know how important you are to me,
How you can choose to be the creator of the person that is me if you choose,
Please choose to.
You alone can break down the wall behind which I tremble,
You alone can remove my mask,
You alone can release me from my shadow world of panic and uncertainty.
Do not pass me by.
Please…do not pass me by.
It will not be easy for you.
A long conviction of worthlessness builds strong walls,
The nearer you approach me, the blinder I strike back.
I fight against the very thing I cry out for,
But I’m told that love is stronger than walls, and in this lies my hope.
Please try to break down those walls with firm hands, but with a gentle heart,
For a child is very sensitive.
Who am I, you may wonder?
I am someone you know very well.
For I am every man you meet and I am every woman you meet.